Just got my nails done today and it was uglyyyy…

My nails were stamped. And I initially wanted the paint ones as they were more authentic and, you know, look more beautiful than stamping nails or fake nails.

But the lady at the nail art booth was confusing and the missunderstanding ended up with my ugly nails.

She should’ve just said “we use stamping nails for this” instead of “we use different ink for this design.”

Well part of it was my fault, I should’ve been more specific with what i want.

A poor image from my poor phone camera from last night’s event

fashion show

So I went to a fashion show event last night. It was the first time in my life to go on such event, considering that I am not a socialite, not that fashionable and not a princess.

How did I get the invitation as a nobody? Well, my designer mba Alma invited my mom and I to the event and she was one of 21 designers that joined the fashion show.

My comment, the fashion show was great, the big ballroom, the food, in general I had a lot of fun.

But after around dozen designers showed off their collections, I got bored and left after I watched mba Alma’s collection.

Besides the fashions show, I was very curious with the audience. I read Cosmopolitan and many fashion blogs, so I expected fashionable crowds and at the same time I was worried with my own outfit. (FYI, I wore a batik dress from Bringharjo market and my ankle boots).

It turned out that the crowds were not as fashionable as I thought. Well some people did dressed up, but many others wore simple batik dresses like my mom and I. I guess the ones that dressed up were either designers or Yogyakarta’s socialites.

Well it’s Jogja, so it’s obvious that the fashions show was somewhat a little humble, at least for me.

Other things that glimpsed my eyes were some people in casual attire of jeans and shirts with backpacks. Yup, they were the media.

Back when I was a reporter, every time I attended such glamorous events with formal dress code, I always looked for other reporters who usually wore casual clothes like I was. I guess it become a habit to automatically spot reporters on the field.

Not only that, I also felt the urged to pay huge attention to the show and the speeches, as a preparation to write, which was totally unnecessary because I was there as an audience.

It was not helping, when a friend of mine text me asking if I was there to cover the fashions show…

It was just getting more and more sad.

I hate to admit it, but I do miss being a reporter.

Finally, some alone time

After I became unemployed last week, I was looking for some time to be alone, without TV or comic books or even Popo. Just me, listening to music and probably writing my random thoughts.

And I finally have that time here at the airport, waiting for the plane for about 2 more hours.

Not what I’ve planned though. First I thought of enjoying my alone time at my apartment, after Popo went to work. But the TV or the comics got my attention, plus all the houseworks that I had to do.

Another perfect time was when I was on my way to Puncak, highlands near Jakarta. We passed this spot called Puncak Pass, where I could enjoy the view cities and hills from the top.

 I knew it would be super awesome if I could go there and enjoy the view alone while thinking what I need to do next. Sadly we were too exhausted and ended up sleeping.

Usually every time I face troubles or difficulties, I always call my close friends or families to talk about it. Next I will listen to music out loud and reading comic books just to get my mind out of it. 

Not this time. This time I just want to sit down and do nothing. Maybe I need some kind of meditation. Its funny how I used to despise meditation because I don’t see the point of doing it. And now I feel somewhat more relax after sitting and doing nothing for only 20 minutes.

Officially jobless

After one year and three months, I’m now officially jobless.

My feeling was mixed up, still is actually, about this.

I guess I’ve always known that I don’t belong in the office, so I kinda got the vibe that this thing would come. Even so, I’m still sad that I couldn’t stay longer in that place. 

It’s just that place had been my dream since I was in college. So to realize that I stopped working there after only a year was so hard.

It’s like I like this particular dress and dream about wearing it, but after saving up an buying it, the dress doesn’t fit. Even after I try to squeeze in so hard that it hurts, the dress still doesn’t fit. So I have to let it go. 

And it’s killing me because I really really want to wear that dress. 

But, despite how cliche this my sound, I believe Allah prepares better job and adventure for me.

I said goodbye to my friends, editors, and mentors last week. It was sad but I was pretty happy because they seemed to enjoy my presence in the past year. Too bad I couldn’t find the editor in chief in my last day of working.

Anywho, last year was amazing and unforgettable. The experiences, the lessons, even the nagging changed me into a new (and I hope) and better person.

As for the responses, my parents and Popo were happy that I didn’t have to come home at night again. Sipa is still being her with no comment in general. My girlfriends were as mixed up as I was. The good thing is that all of them support me to get through this.